Patient D

An Addict’s Story

            My name is Kyle C. and I am an addict.  I have focused the past two years of my life on becoming educated about my disease.  The following is my story-

            My life started out on the right track.  I was born into a loving and stable family.  My parents were not afflicted with addiction; however I do share this disease with my grandparents on both sides of the family.  I was fortunate enough to go to well accredited schools while growing up and I did receive some education about drug use from my parents and my teachers.  I knew from an early age that drugs would definitely lead you down the wrong path.  Unfortunately, this education was not enough and I started on the drug road when I was about 15 years old.

It all started with marijuana, the true gateway drug.  I liked smoking pot, but it wasn’t my favorite.  When I was 16 I found an old bottle of Vicodin in my parents’ medicine cabinet.  I took a few of the pills and waited to see what would happen.  Once they kicked in and I felt the high, I knew I had found the drug for me.  At the time Vicodin seemed harmless.  After all, these drugs were prescribed by doctors, how dangerous could they be?  A few of my friends had also discovered Vicodin and we began taking them every day.  We all had insurance and we found numerous doctors who were willing to prescribe the drug.  Through the combination of all our efforts, we had plenty of Vicodin to support our growing habits.

By the time I was 19, I was completely strung out on pain pills.  To make matters even worse I discovered a new and more powerful opiate called OxyContin and I loved it..  What was even better was that OxyContin could be crushed up and either sniffed or injected.  Unknown at the time, a hard road lay ahead for me.  My character had begun to change due to my drug use and I found myself committing crimes to support my habit.  I had to keep using at all costs.  My drug use came before everything else including my family, my friends, and any job I had at the time.  It’s hard to stay employed when you need your first dose of drug just to get out of bed.   Every day was a struggle to survive and I found myself trapped by my drug use.

My disease had turned me to a criminal behavior and I was living a life of isolation.  My entire purpose had become focused on OxyContin.  I lived to use and used to live.  What had happened to me?  I had started off so well.  I knew I needed help, but I wasn’t sure where to turn.  What’s even worse was that a large part of me wanted to continue doing drugs.  I had become a complete slave to my addiction.  Luckily, some of the crimes I had been committing were catching up to me.  I knew the police were on to me, but I didn’t care.  I just wanted out and knew my day of reckoning was coming.  Finally I was arrested for conspiracy to commit bank robbery, and it looked like I was going away for a long time.

The government actually did something smart.  Instead of sending me to prison, they sent me to a court ordered rehab program for nine months.  I was very thankful.  While in the program I really tried to listen and learn as much as possible.  Nine months is a long time and I went through some intense therapy.  I had finally put together some clean time and I looked and felt so much better.  Staying clean in the program was easy, but staying clean on the streets would prove to be much more difficult.  When I got out I began to experience extreme cravings.  The addict in me was still there and still incredibly strong.  It was like my disease had been in the background doing push-ups the whole time I had been clean.  Eventually I began using once again.  Luckily, things were different when I was high.  My head was so full of recovery that I didn’t enjoy using like I had in the past.  I felt really bad about my relapses but I still continued to slip.  It seemed that I knew how to get clean; I just didn’t know how to stay clean.

I found out my best friend had the same problem and he started seeing Dr. Dane Howalt, an addiction specialist at the San Luis Obispo Addiction Recovery Center.  Doctor Howalt is one of the few physicians in the country allowed to prescribe a revolutionary drug called Suboxone and my friend was actually staying clean and sober without using or having any slips.  I decided to make an appointment and Dr. Howalt started me on Suboxone.  Suboxone completely changed my life.  The cravings I had before I started taking this medicine have disappeared and I have actually been able to put together some substantial clean time.  I feel a lot better about myself because Suboxone has provided me with a firm foundation to stand on.  Today I hold down two jobs and I go to college full time.  I even got a raise last month!  I actually have a normal life as a productive citizen.  Suboxone has been a huge help in making all this possible.  I believe that Suboxone in combination with involvement in 12-Step programs is a great start on the road to recovery.  I finally feel like I can make it in life.  Thank you Suboxone.